


Take it out!

by zsomeone



Category: Metalocalypse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-05
Updated: 2013-09-05
Packaged: 2018-03-17 00:48:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3508937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zsomeone/pseuds/zsomeone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What is going on in Pickles’ room?  That’s what everybody wants to know.<br/>After Nathan and Pickles lock themselves in there, the other guys end listening at the door.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take it out!

Skwisgaar turned the corner and was greeted by the strange sight of Toki leaning against Pickles’ door. “What’s you-“  
“Shhhh!” Toki hissed softly but demandingly, waving him closer.  
Whispering now, Skwisgaar joined him. “Okays, what?”  
“They’s actings weird, and then they goes in there and locks the door!”  
“....Ands?”  
“Listens!”

But before Skwisgaar could put his ear to the door, here came Murderface. “Hey guysch-“  
“Shhh!” They both hissed at him.  
“Somet’ing ams weird, we ams goings to listen to de doors.”  
“Okay?” Murderface whispered back. “Schounds like a plan.”  
The three of them pressed an ear to the door.

“Is it in yet?” Nathan’s voice sounded unsure.  
“No, you’ll know when it is, now hold still.”  
“But I’m pretty drunk...”  
“You’ll know. Trust me, I know what I’m doin’, alreet?”

“So how many times have you, um, done this?”  
“Dood, too many to remember them all! I still can’t believe you never have! Ever?”  
“I almost did! This one time, back in high school. But then I didn’t.”  
“Alreet, I’m ready. You gatta hold real still...”

Nathan’s scream made them all flinch away from the door, but they quickly returned.  
“IT HURTS! GET IT OUT!”  
“HOLD STILL! Damnit, Nathan, yer making this harder than it needs to be! An’ stawp bein’ a big baby, it’s nawt thet bad!”  
The only reply was a loud angry groan.

“Liddle bit more...”  
“THIS REALLY FUCKING HURTS!”  
“Stawp actin’ like I’m killin’ you, yer the one who asked fer it!”  
“I know. You’re doing good. I guess. I don’t know. I’m never doing this again!”

“You never did tell me why we’re even doin’ this in the first place.”  
Nathan growled before replying. “Because somebody bet I wouldn’t do it. Hurry up and take the fucking picture and get that thing out of me!”  
“Alreet... Lemme take a couple jest to be sure we git a good one. Oooh yer bleedin’ a liddle. Sahrry, but I told you to hold still.”  
“That’s okay, it’s good. They can’t say I faked it.”

“Okie we’re done, you want me to take it out fast or slow?”  
Uh..... I don’t know! Fast?”  
There was another loud scream, making them all jump back again. That sounded awful!  
Unfortunately for them, this meant they missed the footsteps coming toward the door. Nathan walked out, not looking at all pleased to see them.

“What the fuck are you guys looking at?!” They were staring at him, looking guilty.  
“Nothings!”  
“Jus’ passings by... on my ways... dat ways...”  
“Uh, what’sch up, bro?”

Nathan just snarled at them and stalked off to wherever he was going next. Fuck those guys, spying on him! Fuck them.  
Knowing they’d been caught, they all felt lucky that Nathan just walked away. There were much worse ways that could have ended, _much_ worse.  
Listening at doors wasn’t a good idea after all.  
Not one of them had even noticed the small, bloody hole in Nathan’s earlobe


End file.
